Today my history professor, a rumpled, pot-bellied guy in his mid thirties, walked into class looking all excited, which made the rest of us nervous, because he’s known for pop quizzes. He took a deep breath and said, “I have been waiting for this moment my entire teaching career. So please, pull out your textbooks and…” in a British accent, glowering at us all ferociously, “TURN TO PAGE THREE HUNDRED AND NINETY FOUR.”
We. All. DIED.
I AM COMPLETELY SERIOUS.
So what do you want to be for Halloween?
I think I should be Thor.
You know Thor's a boy right?
Yeah and I'm a girl and I want to be Thor.
Don't you want to be something pretty?
Thor is pretty.